Bigtrunk Spotted

Rumor has it – and a dozen or so designated spin-meisters are on record confirming it, that a creature that is part war hero, part political maverick, part long-time Washington insider, member of most exclusive club in America (The US Senate), friend of lobbyists, and (though no identifying marks were seen on the body or anywhere in the convention hall) registered Republican, was seen ambling about the woods and arenas of St. Paul, Minnesota this week, giving speeches and grinning foolishly. Unfortunately for true believers, this time there is no over-sized freezer with what appears to be a submerged rubber elephant, no fuzzy long-distance photograph of a similar mutant pachyderm with strategically placed foliage, and no you-tube video of the good old boys who first encountered - what the press are calling, Bigtrunk! Sceptics assert that this is just another case of a mythic creature comprised of – perhaps ingeniously, body parts from a dozen separate conservatives. “This is nothing new“ – Frank Mand, a spokesmen for SORB told BFHH. “Republicans have tried on all sorts of costumes over the last dozen years. They were Reagan Republicans, Compassionate Conservatives, Terrorism Experts, and now they’re agents of change. “Read my lips,” Mand concluded, “Bigtrunk does not exist.”